(2-minute read time)

Every year I make a trek back home to upstate New York for my annual family reunion. I love my family, I really do but I don’t exactly count this trip as a “ fun vacation”.  

Why?  Because, as much as I love them all, family dynamics can bring up stress.    

This year I firmly decided before I ever even left that this was going to be a stress and drama free trip.  

How can I possibly decide that it was going to be a good time when I had no idea what other people might do?  What if they do something annoying? What if they don’t do something they said they would do? What if they get all loud and weird?  

The fact of the matter is that it truly does not matter what they do or don’t do.  I have no control over that and I never will. (Nor do I want to!)

What really matters is what I do.  

This year, I just reminded myself that everyone gets to do whatever they want to do.  And, so do I.

As adults, we ALL get to choose to do whatever we want to do.  Even if it’s rude or unkind or embarrassing. Even if it’s illegal or immoral.  

People choose these things all the time.

My job is not to control anyone’s actions.  My only job is to choose my response.

Of course, I got the chance to test my conviction.  There was a moment where things did not go as I would’ve chosen.  In the past, I would have indulged in complaining about how awful it is/they are.  

Not this year.  Nope. I stuck to my conviction about everyone getting to do what they want and off I went to do what I wanted to do.  It was a beautiful day in upstate NY that day and I was not about to waste a moment of it. It turned out perfect.

It made me wonder, how many fun moments have I traded for lamenting other people’s choices?   

Probably too many.

The frustration that comes along with people not doing what we desire is certainly not limited to family reunions.  It happens in our workplaces, in our homes, where we volunteer, even where we shop and play and drive.

It’s incredibly freeing when you decide to let people do what they want.  Chances are they are going to do it whether you agree or not anyway.   

You give them freedom, you get freedom.  It’s a win-win.

Who in your life is keeping you from freedom?  I can definitely help, just click here to schedule a free, 30-minute discovery session.   

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