Month: April 2019

(2-minute read time)

I have been reading a bit about Imposter Syndrome lately. Merriam-Webster defines it as: “a false and sometimes crippling belief that one’s successes are the product of luck or fraud rather than skill”

When I first heard about it I recall thinking “Oh. My. Gosh. That was me. There’s a NAME for this???  Who knew??”.   

Mine was not crippling, more like an annoying gnat in the summertime that you can’t really see but gets in your face once in a while.    

I read a study recently that found up to 70% of people experience Imposter Syndrome at some point in their career so chances are you’ve had it too.  

In my “How to Get Promoted at Work (without working harder)” program my clients are setting their sights on, and achieving, the next level in their careers.  When we start out they think they really want that promotion, they imagine how awesome it’s going to be. And then, just about 100% of the time, when they get promoted there’s a freak-out period of fear and regret.

It’s usually some variation of “What was I thinking?? What have I done???” followed by a gazillion ‘What If’ questions like:

“What if I made the wrong choice?”

“What if they hate me?”

“What if I am not cut out for this job?”

All of these feelings and questions are classic indicators of Imposter Syndrome.  

The truth is, even if you fail at your job and got fired you probably would not end up homeless on the streets right?  So go ahead, answer those questions “What if” questions in your mind. Play the tape out and you’ll find the worst case scenario isn’t all that scary.  

Moreover, it is highly unlikely that the worst case scenario happens.  Chances are the people who promoted you had very good reasons for doing so.  They saw something in you that you just can’t see right now (hence the freak-out).    

Once you get done answering all the “What if” questions in your brain, remind yourself of all the reasons you wanted this position.  When you went after it you believed you could do it. Those same beliefs are available to you now. What YOU think about you matters way more than what anyone else does.        

Want some help getting promoted or getting over your Imposter Syndrome?  I can help click here to schedule a free, 30-minute Discovery Session with me.    

P.S. – For those of you looking forward to #2019moonshotgoals, they’re moving to Wednesdays!               

(2 minute read time)

I came back from vacation and my boss told me that while I was gone, a new team member had been assigned to me.  

Wait.  What?? I didn’t get to select my own team member?

That’s.  Not. Good.  

I was expecting it to be horrible.  I was sure it was probably some troubled, under-performing employee.  Someone else’s headache had just been assigned to me.

Great.  Just great.  

And actually, it turned out it was great.  How, you ask?

Before I met my new employee, I took time to notice my negative perspective and I decided I did not like it.  So, I made some different decisions:

I decided it wasn’t a problem that I did not get to select her myself.  

I decided she deserved a fair shake and I decided that I was going to give that to her.

I decided it was possible I was wrong about her and that it all could work out well.     

Ultimately, I changed my expectations.  

Our expectations shape our reality.  Science proves it.

Back in 1963, a study was done where two groups of students were given mice and asked to run them through a maze.  Some groups were told they had “maze bright” mice that were genetically bred for superior maze solving. The other groups were told they had “maze dull” mice, ones that were not bred specifically for the task.

There actually was no difference between the mice, they were all standard lab rats.  But guess what happened?

The “maze bright” mice performed far better.  Why?

It’s called The Expectancy Effect and, for better or for worse, it changes outcomes.

How do you suppose it would have gone with my new employee if I had not decided to change my expectations?  I probably would have showed up with some resentment and animosity. She probably would have responded negatively to my negativity. And I would have been able to say “See, I knew it!”.

The brain likes to be right.  It’s more efficient that way. Let’s help it to be right about the right things.   

Expectations can be sneaky.  They just feel like an inevitable reality sometimes.  I can help you get rid of those unhelpful ones, just click here to schedule a free, 30-minute discovery session.   

(3 minute read time)

I was writing content for my business.  It was going to be a great piece on Productivity and Time Management.  

Then, the unthinkable happened.  Writer’s Block.

Listen y’all, I write a lot in my job.  I would have never taken up this line of work if Writer’s Block was something I struggled with regularly.  

And yet, I kept missing my own deadlines.  Missing deadlines, for a piece on TIME MANAGEMENT!?!?!?  (Isn’t it ironic, don’t cha think?)

And then, a light bulb went off.  

I realized I was not buying my own beliefs.  I was writing all these amazing tips about how to get stuff done efficiently and not following them myself.  I wasn’t walking the talk.

If I just followed my own advice, I would have met my deadlines.  I could have skipped the drama, frustration and irritation.

How about you?  Have you ever given an employee some great advice only to find yourself not doing that very thing you said would help?

Having spent 20+ years in corporate, I know I am not the only one who struggles with this.  I know there are leaders out there, like me, who have great concepts, strategies, and solutions.  They share their wisdom with others but sometimes fail to execute it for themselves.

The most important person to manage on your team is you.

The best (and I do mean THE BEST) leadership strategy I have learned over the years is to get inside the minds of employees, be curious about their perspective and understand why they make the choices they do.  

This helps in both forward and reverse.  We can use this skill to understand past decisions our employees have made as well as influence their thinking going forward.    

But, there’s a caveat….

This only works well when we get really good at using it to monitor ourselves first:

Do you know why you do what you do?  

Do you know why you feel the way you feel?  

Do you know why you have the results you do?

The answers to all of these questions are in your brain.  

Your brain is your most valuable resource.  It is the source of all of your past, present and future results.  Yet, few of us take time to manage it. We just live at the effect of it.  No questions asked.

Not managing our brains is like getting the latest iPhone and just letting it be a simple phone and ignoring all of its other powerful uses.

So how do you know if you are managing yourself well?  It’s easy, take a look at your results. Are you getting the results you really want?  Are your relationships the way you want them to be? Are your goals being met? Are you living the kind of life you want to live?  If not, then it’s time to consider how you can improve your self-management skills.

When you figure all of this out for yourself, it is much easier to influence and lead others.  People will naturally want to follow you.

If you want to get really good at managing people, you must manage yourself first.  I can definitely help, just click here to schedule a free, 30-minute discovery session.   

(2 minute read time)

Lily came to me after having been laid off.  She was shocked, it was unexpected, she was in panic-mode.  She needed to replace her income immediately. She described the lay off and shared that it felt like she was “blindsided” and “a failure”. She was sure she was going to have to just settle for whatever came along.

We discussed what her next job might be like and which companies might hire her, she said:

“But, that’s just out of my control, there’s nothing I can do about it”

Have you ever found yourself believing this same thing?

It’s true, there are things in our lives both personally and professionally that we can not control.  Examples include; the things other people say and do, getting laid off, the economy, weather, traffic etc.  

All hope is not lost though.  Because what we can control, our minds, makes all the difference.

This may shock you but, being laid off is actually completely neutral – it’s not good, it’s not bad, it just is.  It happens to people every day.

All of the circumstances that we cannot control in life are completely neutral.  

Yes, all of them.

I recall my own experience with being laid off and how it was just the kick in the pants I needed to get out there and start my own business. Lily and I saw both see being laid off very differently.  If being laid off were inherently bad, everyone would see it the same way and everyone feel the same way about it.

The fact that circumstances are neutral is the best news ever because that means we get to interpret them any way we want to.  

We get to choose. We have control again.

It is absolutely critical to wield that control in an intentional way.  
If Lily chose to continue to see herself as “blindsided” and “a failure” that was certainly going to impact her job search, negatively of course.  Just imagine the kind of results you might get if you attempt something from the place of being a blindsided failure. Probably not great.

Through our work together Lily was able to choose a much more helpful, and believable, perspective on the uncontrollable situation of being laid off.  With her new angle on the past she was able to approach her future in a much more excited and confident way.

What uncontrollable situation are you facing today?  I can definitely help, just click here to schedule a free, 30-minute discovery session.   

(2-minute read time)

Job descriptions can be helpful.  They clarify expectations, communicate organizational objectives, and often, culture.  They can also be ambiguous and limiting and outdated. Especially in a fast-paced, ever-changing organization.

When is the last time you looked at the job description for the position you currently hold?   Unless you were recently hired, it’s likely been a while.

No need to go dust it off.  I’ll just tell you what it’s saying in one line:

“Create and deliver value”   

The best and easiest way I know to make work super-fun and be an invaluable employee is to find out what is valuable to your customer (internal and external), then go make it happen.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself to get started:

• What does not yet exist in my workplace that would make things better for my employees/clients/co-workers/leaders?

• What needs to be fixed?

• What could I create that would amaze our customers?

• I know it would be really helpful if I  __________?

Here’s why it’s more fun this way.  It is kind of like finding the best birthday present ever for someone and you can’t wait to give it to them!  You just know they are going to love it. Sure, you had to do some work to find it, but it was totally worth it.  

Creating value works no matter what level you are at in the organization.  And it always brings great returns. Every. Single. Time.

If you are an individual contributor – work is a whole lot more fun and your leaders are going to start looking at you in a different light.  

For those of you who have direct reports, tell me this doesn’t sound dreamy??   Your employee just wants to find out what is most important to you and her sole focus is to go make that happen??   C’mon – pinch me already!

You are already valuable exactly as you are.  You don’t have to do any of this to become more valuable.  But, if you want some help giving it a go, just click here to schedule a free discovery session.