How to Control the Uncontrollable

(2 minute read time)

Lily came to me after having been laid off.  She was shocked, it was unexpected, she was in panic-mode.  She needed to replace her income immediately. She described the lay off and shared that it felt like she was “blindsided” and “a failure”. She was sure she was going to have to just settle for whatever came along.

We discussed what her next job might be like and which companies might hire her, she said:

“But, that’s just out of my control, there’s nothing I can do about it”

Have you ever found yourself believing this same thing?

It’s true, there are things in our lives both personally and professionally that we can not control.  Examples include; the things other people say and do, getting laid off, the economy, weather, traffic etc.  

All hope is not lost though.  Because what we can control, our minds, makes all the difference.

This may shock you but, being laid off is actually completely neutral – it’s not good, it’s not bad, it just is.  It happens to people every day.

All of the circumstances that we cannot control in life are completely neutral.  

Yes, all of them.

I recall my own experience with being laid off and how it was just the kick in the pants I needed to get out there and start my own business. Lily and I saw both see being laid off very differently.  If being laid off were inherently bad, everyone would see it the same way and everyone feel the same way about it.

The fact that circumstances are neutral is the best news ever because that means we get to interpret them any way we want to.  

We get to choose. We have control again.

It is absolutely critical to wield that control in an intentional way.  
If Lily chose to continue to see herself as “blindsided” and “a failure” that was certainly going to impact her job search, negatively of course.  Just imagine the kind of results you might get if you attempt something from the place of being a blindsided failure. Probably not great.

Through our work together Lily was able to choose a much more helpful, and believable, perspective on the uncontrollable situation of being laid off.  With her new angle on the past she was able to approach her future in a much more excited and confident way.

What uncontrollable situation are you facing today?  I can definitely help, just click here to schedule a free, 30-minute discovery session.