(3-Minute read time)
The Thanksgiving season is upon us! It’s my absolute most favorite holiday – good eats, good times with friends and family, plus here in Florida we usually have some gorgeous weather. Lots to be grateful for!
Despite it being the season where many of us focus on gratitude, I thought it was the perfect time to write about the seemingly opposite emotion, wanting.
Gratitude is defined as “warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful”. Some will argue that being truly grateful means being totally content with what one already has. Even the definition above supports this, notice for a moment the word “received” is past tense. The argument here is that wanting is equivalent to lack and lack nullifies gratitude.
We’re taught to be grateful for what is, not what could be. We’re told gratitude and wanting can not co-exist.
In contrast, I think we can and should be grateful for something we want that just hasn’t happened yet.
Wait? Be grateful while we still want something? How?
Glad you asked. It’s really just a matter of taking your mind to the place where it’s already happened and deciding if it’s something you’d be grateful for. For example, this holiday season I am traveling from sunny Florida to colder weather. This is not my usual practice – I moved here from NY for a reason! I do not enjoy cold weather. At all. Most years I don’t go. It’s too cold, I know I won’t enjoy it, I won’t be grateful for the experience, so I don’t go. And yet, this year I want to go. I want to see my loved ones and just be present with them, even if it’s chilly (ok freezing, but you get my point).
As I envision that future time with friends and family, I see all the details – who’s there, where we are… I imagine the welcome home hugs, the laughing, the sleeping in, and definitely the eating. I imagine I probably won’t get to see everyone I’d like to, but the moments with people I do get to see will matter, we will be creating lasting memories.
As I let this image sink in, it becomes more real and gratitude emerges. It’s different than anticipation, it’s an appreciation. An appreciation for family and the holidays. An appreciation for the ability to cultivate loving relationships despite the miles between my family and I. An appreciation for just being able to hit the pause button on daily life and gratefully enter into a different pace.
The trip hasn’t happened, I’m not leaving until next week. I want to go, I am looking forward to going. But, I haven’t yet. Nonetheless, I am feeling extremely grateful for what’s to come. See? Gratitude and wanting can co-exist.
Wanting doesn’t make us a selfish, ungrateful, thankless human. Wanting is part of what makes us human. It’s in our nature to grow and evolve. When we’re little we desire mobility and so without being told we crawl, then cruise, then walk and run. The same continues throughout our whole life.
It’s totally natural to desire more, tap our untapped potential, find deeper meaning, level up our lives, have a purpose, and truly SPEND this one life we’ve been given. It’s an expression of gratitude to get out there and do something with it!
When we tap into the desires for our life we unleash positive impact in the world. Unfortunately, when I ask many of my clients what it is they really want, they say “I don’t know”. That only keeps potential shackled.
This Thanksgiving, consider dialing it up a notch on the wanting. I want you to want even more for your amazing life. Not because this life stinks, but because you were made for more. Not a single one of us is finished growing and evolving. And that’s something to be grateful for.
Trying to figure out what you really want? I can definitely help, just click here to schedule a free, 30-minute discovery session.
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